Note to my Blog

Dear Blog,

I am sorry I have left you alone for quite some time. It's not that I have totally forgotten you, but I finally found that I have better life than before.

First, when I move to my new house, I realised that what I have been missing most in my life. I have finally known what it's like to have a sense of community. I have superb neighbours, so superb that I have even volunteered to be a committee member for the residents association. I got along great with all the people along my road. For heaven sake, we even have midnight-till-morning chit chat session in the middle of the road in front of our houses. Not to mention our routine friday night badminton session and our weekend ping-pong matches. Though I suck in both games (which is evident from my never-having-won any matches), I truly enjoy the atmosphere surrounding it. The guys will play the games, the kids will play with each other and our wives are chatting and exchanging notes on household tips (and more?).

Second, I have been able to keep myself fit. I am more disciplined with my exercise routine and my tennis skills have improved tremendously. I know this may sound sadistic, but I found a sense of utmost satisfaction seeing my friends scrambling and struggling to return my serve and and forehands. At times, I can feel this sense of invincibility in me. Forgive me for sounding arrogant but if you are in my position, you would be doing it too.

Thirdly, I am more in control of my work. I can't help it when I am able to meet my deadlines and also helped other people realised their potential. At the mid of last year, I have two managers transferred to my area for further development. Today, one of them has truly improved by leaps and bound and the other is heading in the same path. To put icing to the cake, one of my staff was recently promoted in another area for his outstanding achievement.

So my dear blog, please forgive me for abandoning you for such a long time. I simply can't help it. I am sure you would do the same to if you are in my shoe. And if you do, I truly, truly understand why you do it.

In the mood

It's been a while that I haven't updated my blog. Not that I don't want to but because I cannot afford to spare the time. Even when I do have time, I was not in the mood because of the exhaustion I felt from the many multiple tasks and projects that I am handling now. Some of my friends has been pestering me to update my blog (okay superchica, I am doing it now!).

However, today, I am in the mood to update something. Mainly because:

1) Roger Federer won the US Open
2) I found back my close friend from my alma mater - Mr Cicakman
3) My sons have been fasting thus far
4) I have yet to miss my 'terawih' to date
5) I have just celebrated my 10th anniversary last Friday
6) Things seems to be under better control and more stable at work
7) I have finished shopping for my kids Hari Raya clothings

So much of good things has happen to me for the last few days that I guess it warrants some entry in the blog.

Thank you GOD for ALL the blessings that you have given me and my family. At times, I felt that GOD has been super-generous with me, to the point that I felt I don't really deserve them. But I guess He knows best.

I think I am going for a new goal in life. Perhaps to win my first tennis Grand Slam at the age of 40?

Sore Loser

I have been in a very foul mood for the last couple of days. The reason? .......Federer lost his Wimbledon title.

Get a life Luke!

A little 'Pick-me-up'

I have to say that I have been quite down for the last couple of days. Mainly because of work overload and the demands on me that barely pass the 'reasonableness' test. In most of the time, I will find within me things that will continue to motivate me but nowadays, that self-motivation mechanism is verging on a breakdown.

I think God must have loved me so much that just when I was about to spiral down further, I receive an email from my confidant that puts me back on track again. The email was not one of those long and wordy words of encouragement but a rather sweet and simple quotation that somehow hugely overhauls the key component of my self-motivation mechanism.

Sometimes we don't realise that you can touch people in ways that you don't even realise. Thanks Superchica for the thoughts. I will forever etch those words in my heart.

Its just too much!!

I am close to reaching my breaking point today. Early this morning, I started my day with wild ramblings and scolding to my staff, followed by exchange of nasty emails and heated tele-conversation with people in my department. I just can't stand it when people are taking their own sweet time to do their jobs, and on top of that conveniently pass the buck to others. I guess my temperamental showdown this morning works as I began to see things are moving again.

Then, the pressure of handling voluminous (and sometimes ridiculous) requests from other departments again makes me losing my cool. Sometimes I wonder where does all these thick people comes from? Can't they understanding simple instructions? We are in the midst of cost control mode and yet they still have the cheek to ask for extravagance. I could swear that for a brief moment, I was close to utter a couple of 'f***-off's to them.

I am truly under a tremendous pressure lately. My deadlines are way overdue, my team seems to be moving at a snail pace, other people doesn't seems to be cooperative, there are issues accumulating as several of my projects progress, whilst at personally level, I still have these chores to do for m family and my relative. I don't think I can handle this anymore. I am NOT a superhero!!

And to top it all, I just found out that my name was due for international postings and it was stopped because my boss does not want to release me. Apparently, I have yet to complete my projects. Please tell me when can I finish my projects if new things keep coming to my table and I have to keep on rescuing other projects that cannot be handle by some incompetent fools that we employ at higher positions!

Screw all of them!!!

Count your blessing

Don't we all experience at least one day in your life that you seems to have everything in the world? Yesterday, I was lazying around on my bed watching a DVD from my laptop (yes, I am one of those people who does not have a DVD player in the house!). Then my wife joined me on the bed watching the DVD. Then, my kids join us in the room and started playing and making noises in the room. Whilst my eyes was totally glued to the small screen on my laptop (and amidst the multi-decibel noise around me), I can't help but feel I must be one of the most blessed person in the world. I have a good career, great family and sufficient material possessions that enable us to live pretty comfortably. What else could I ask for. I have to say, god has been very, very kind to me. Some people might view this as complacency, but I see that being satisfied of what you have is god's most wonderful gift to human being.

Many a times we tend to compare ourselves with others using material possessions as the yardstick. Whereas, true blessings comes in all forms. The fact that I have a good babysitter to take care of my kids, a kind 'pakcik' to send and fetch my kids to/from schools, a very understanding wife who takes care of me and my kids very well, and three wonderful boys that look up to you as if you are this superhero who has answers to everything in the world, has all contributed to me having this serene state of mind. I wonder how many of us really see the world from this point of view. The next time when you feel you are short compared to others, please remember this - count your blessing!

Life's Priority

It's funny how's one perspective can change as you grow older. When I was in my early professional life, I used to think that turning in a good work is of utmost importance in life. There's nothing more sweeter to hear when your boss tells you what a great job you have done, or in the case of some 'hard-to-please' boss, a mere approving glance that exudes he or she is delighted with your work. On the other hand, there's nothing more devastating than getting harsh criticism for your work. I dreaded when people think I am a useless goons.

Nowadays, other people's opinion doesn't matter anymore. I have come to a place that I was so secure with my own ability that I don't need anybody to endorse whether I am a good worker or not. And I found this very assuring. In fact, I have found little things such as spending time with your children or playing some silly bubble blowing game with your kids can be so much more satisfying than say clinching some multi-million dollar deal.

I guess this is part of maturity.